Families, everyone is different and I’d be lying if I said that any of them were perfect. Everyone has their arguments and some relatives you try to avoid, but what happens when a close family member becomes more than just a little annoying? Is it ever OK to cut them out of your life?
Quite simply YES.
I strongly believe that you are in control of your own life and the people in it. If someone has such a negative impact on your life, then I think its acceptable to just cut them out.
I’m not talking about brotherly sisterly arguments, obviously that happens with every family but if the situation is becoming unbearable then you start to consider what your life would be like without the conflict.
- Bite your tongue
I know it probably seems like you’ve been doing this for a long time but a little more wont hurt. Really think about what you want and don’t say things in the heat of the moment that you will later regret.
- Is it the right time?
If you are young, single and broke then cutting off a parent and ending up homeless doesn’t really sound like anyone wins from the situation. It might sound like you are using the other person, but the goal is YOUR happiness and if you can’t support yourself then maybe now isn’t the right time to say FU if your going to end up worse off.
- Will you be better off?
I know not speaking to someone seems like all you want to do but do they have any redeeming qualities? There is no point creating tension and awkwardness in a family only to regret your decision and apologise a week later. Do you need to work on your relationship rather than end it?
- Do what is best for you
Families can be cruel as well as kind. Staying in an abusive environment is more damaging in the long term. It may be hard, they may apologise and tell you not to go, but a change in behaviour is more heartfelt than just words.
- Time to heal
In time maybe things will get better, some time apart may be for the best but it doesn’t have to be forever. Think about whether your life would be any more beneficial with that person in it, and if after time apart then the answer is still no, then maybe it was the right decision. Equally this doesn’t have to be the end, people can change.
Like I said do not take this decision lightly, you may hurt those around you, but if cutting someone off is what you have to do, it is OK.
Sometimes you have to put your own happiness first and in time they may understand.